Healthy Relationships
Relationships are a big part of life. Healthy relationships bring out the best in you and make you feel good about yourself. A healthy relationship does not mean a “perfect” relationship. Healthy relationships, whether romantic or platonic, manifest themselves as healthy communication and loving yourself. Someone who is codependent evaluates their self-worth based on the other person and they will only feel good about themselves by making sacrifices for the other person.
You can only let real love and friendship in without the risk of codependency when you are an independent person, which is why you need to cultivate a relationship with yourself. You are whole as a separate entity, you are not going to find real love and friendship without that love and friendship being exploited by codependency.
Every relationship is unique, and people come together for many different reasons. Part of what defines a healthy relationship is sharing a common goal for exactly what you want the relationship to be and where you want it to go.
Knowing these basic principles can help keep any relationship meaningful, fulfilling, and exciting no matter what goals you are working towards or challenges you are facing together:
You maintain a meaningful emotional connection with each other. The relationship moves at a speed that feels enjoyable for each person. In a healthy relationship, you are not rushed or pressured in a way that makes you feel overwhelmed.
You are not afraid of respectful disagreements. You need to feel safe to express things that bother you without fear of retaliation and be able to resolve conflict without humiliation, degradation or insisting on being right. They may not like what you say but will respond in a considerate way.
You keep outside relationships and interests alive. It is important to sustain your own identity outside of the relationship, preserve connections with others, and maintain your hobbies and interests.
You communicate openly and honestly. Good communication is a key part of any relationship. When people stop communicating well, they stop relating well. As long as you are communicating, you can usually work through whatever problems you are facing. Be clear in your communication, do not make them guess.
A healthy relationship should feel easy and make you happy. You can let loose, laugh together and be yourselves. No relationship is fun a hundred percent of the time, but the good times should outweigh the bad.
